Whole Lesbian Sex
The Stories You Could Tell
Felice Newman, QSyndicate.com
Before I ever did anything really kinky, I made up stories of erotic adventures that were as far from my real life as you could imagine. I poured my erotic aspirations and obsessions into semi-fictitious tales of initiation. ("Semi-fictitious" because my femme co-star was always real; it was what I got to do with her that was made up.) Some of these stories eventually appeared in print; by then, my experience had caught up with my wishing.
Telling stories is an ancient endeavor. As humans, we provide a voiceover that gives shape to our lives. We make up stories about what happens to us, what we wished had happened, and what we hope (or fear) will happen next. Some of those stories become part of our cultural heritage (Beebo Brinker, Rubyfruit Jungle, Macho Sluts). But mostly, our stories function in a more private arena.
The erotic tales we weave for ourselves turn us on, get us off, and open us to worlds of sexual possibility. In fantasy, we can try on sexual activities, roles, and genders. You can have sex with an inappropriate partner (like your boss or your girlfriend's ex, for instance). You can try what we shouldn't (like getting speared anally by an 8-inch vinyl dildo without warm-up or lube) or wouldn't (like getting gangbanged by the guys on the corner – or even gangbanging the guys on the corner).
The freer your erotic imagination, the more sexual possibilities you will have to choose from. If you can articulate your fantasies, so much the better. Sexual communication includes being able to talk about your fantasies and being able to listen, without judgment, to those of your partners. (Once you're open about your sexual fantasies, you can stop wondering whether you're "normal." As soon as you start telling friends and lovers the scenarios that fuel your dreams, you'll find out that you are hardly unique. Many people share your fantasies. In fact, some of your friends may come up with turn-ons way kinkier than yours.)
Here are some fantasy classics:
Anonymous sex. You're in a crowded bar. You make eye contact with a stranger and follow her into a dark corner.
Romance. You exchange soulful gazes, share heart-shattering desire, fall in love.
Cross-orientation. Lesbians can and do get off to fantasies of sex with men, gay or straight.
Gender shifts. You pull out your rod and start beating off. Your partner takes it in her mouth....
Dominance. You partner is on her knees, begging for mercy, for attention, for release, for a spanking, or for an orgasm.
Submission. You give up control. Bound or not, you respond only as directed.
Discipline. You are bent over the teacher's desk with no panties on, about to get spanked for some naughtiness.
Age play. Adult partners adopt age-based (and gender-based) power roles. Daddy/girl, Daddy/boy, Mommy/girl, and Mommy/boy roles are popular forms of age play.
Exhibitionism. Up on the roof, under the boardwalk, or in the backseat of a taxi, public sex can be a big turn-on. Wearing revealing clothing and arranging to be "caught" masturbating are also common themes.
Famous partners (and/or the characters they play). Who gets to be Ennis tonight?
Threesomes. You're going down on one woman while a second is poised behind you, strap-on at the ready.
Initiation rites. You "take" a virgin, teach a novice new tricks, or bring out a straight woman.
Molestation. You are a little girl selling Girl Scout cookies. You ring the bell and a very handsome woman answers the door....
Role play. You're a ship's wench on a pirate vessel, a tyrannical cop, a doctor in a "special" clinic.
Rape. You're forcing another woman to have sex. The debate about rape fantasies usually focuses on the woman as victim. But what about women who fantasize being the rapist?
Edge play. You get hot for water sports, blood play, scarification, or severe sadomasochism.
Taboo sex. Your turn-ons may include vampire play, bestiality, necrophilia, or incest.
Felice Newman is a founding publisher of Cleis Press, coaches individuals and couples and she is the author of "The Whole Lesbian Sex Book: A Passionate Guide for All of Us." She can be reached at LesbianSex@qsyndicate.com. Visit her at www.felicenewman.com
Whole Lesbian Sex: Other Subjects