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FEATURE

Life – a journey or an endless expectation?

The five P's


Story supplied by Elias Scultori | September 01, 2008

Elias Scultori
This is the perfect example of things that are much easier said than done. We all know the answer to this question and we know that every day is a step in the process we began when we first arrived here on this planet. But in spite of knowing this, we continue to get ourselves caught up in a world of expectations that can only give us more frustration and anxiety. How can we take a day at a time and make this process a joy ride instead of a never-ending frustration? Here are 5 items we need to make sure we pack before we go…

Presence
Where is your mind right now? Are you caught in the expectation of the future or in the memories of the past? Life is playing to us right now, in this very moment, and most of us are missing the most important moment: Now! Our mind is constantly worrying about what may or may not happen next or indulging in the feelings of already past experiences. In the process, life passes by and we miss living the full potential of the moment. Stop for a second, look around, look inside. How is your body feeling right now? How is the space that surrounds you? Take a big breath and listen. Life is here and this moment is perfect as it is. Surrender.

Purpose
Even if you want to live a purposeless life, this is your purpose. We are all active beings and in our activity we do have goals. When you look inside your heart, what is your goal? Have you ever thought about it or do you simply live your days stumbling through your to-do list without much meaning. Or perhaps, like most people, you do have ideas of what you want for your life, but you never sat down and made a formal agreement with yourself about the direction you want to take. Now is the time. Having a clear idea of where you are going makes the journey smoother and meaningful. When you get caught in the expectations of the final result, step back and look inside. There resides your true passion. There resides your purpose.

Planning
But what is the point of having purpose if we don’t have planning. We may have a goal, but we also need a strategy to get to this goal. Playing it by ear may not be the most efficient manner to take this journey and in the process we may even end up loosing ourselves. Planning gives us a clear view of our journey and puts us right on the path we are intended to be. But we need to be careful because planning comes with 2 warnings. First, we need to make sure we don’t get caught up in the planning itself without executing it. If all we do is planning, we never go anywhere and nothing is accomplished. This sometimes happens because planning is a very good way to hide and avoid taking the journey all together. Let’s make sure we have a plan, but also that we put our hands to work and follow the plan. Second, we need to always be open to make certain adjustments along the way. Life has a way of making turns we do not expect and although it is important to have a strategy to live our purpose, it is important also to be flexible and understand that what we see is ever so small in the great scheme of things. We can never really count for all the variables. We must then, learn from the hurdles, the drawbacks and appreciate all that life brings to us, even when it is unexpected.

Persistence
As you go along the way, there will be days when it will all seem so very difficult and never ending. You will begin to doubt yourself and to even doubt the whole journey all together. The energy will be low and it will feel like nothing ever comes together. It is right during these moments that you need to take a big breath and look around, look at the big picture. Remember where you were and where you have been. Remember the battles already won and the blessings that came along the way. Most importantly, be present. It is here that you will find strength to continue moving forward. What is this moment trying to say to you? Listen and if necessary refine your approach, adjust but keep going. Never give up!

Patience
And you may be already asking: how can I develop patience when everything seems to be falling apart? You work so very hard, but your goals never seem to come together. That is when we need to go full circle and focus back on the journey. Patience comes with faith. Not necessarily religious faith, but faith in life – faith in the journey. And the journey is not about the goals but about taking every moment as it is. Do you trust in life? Do you trust that life is giving you the exact moment that you are intended to live right now?

A whole journey is made up of a collection of every single moment. Even though we need to trace our path and to set our direction, as we start moving, the joy will come not by the urge to get to the final destination, but instead by paying attention to what is happening now and know that it is in this moment that life is playing at its best and all the riches and full potential are here for us to sip in and enjoy. It is by surrendering to this moment that we will gather the strength and patience to continue. Our goals are stuck on the future. Our regrets and memories belong to the past. Now is the only moment we can really live. If we live now, we will be living our journey. And who knows, we may even surprise ourselves with the outcome. – Issued by Gay Link Content

  • Elias Scultori is a professional life coach working primarily with the GLBT community. His practice and speaking engagements expand across America and abroad. His focus is on helping his clients remove barriers, unearth their talents and true desires so they can build a personal and/or professional life journey that is full, rewarding and authentic. Elias was born in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil and presently lives in Princeton, NJ. To find out more go to www.lifecoaching-egs.com

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