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Gossip So Good, It's Got To Be Gay

Ross von Metzke | August 12, 2008

A Canadian hunk

God, go away to Canada for a week and the world falls apart. Well, sort of – I suppose if you�re in and around the Hollywood scene, it was just a week like any other.

But before we get into the drama that transpired while I spent my time up north Pride-ing my way through Vancouver and zip-lining across Victoria, I feel the need for a hottie to kick start my Saturday.

And in the spirit of consistency, I thought I�d bag us a hottie courtesy of our neighbors to the north. We�ve shown him before and we�ll show him again� men don�t come much hotter than Ryan Reynolds. Who cares if he doesn�t really have a movie to promote and he�s all but married off to Scarlett Johansson – the man is hot, and I have it on good authority from friends who�ve spent time jogging next to him on the treadmill at a certain swanky Santa Monica gym that he looks as good in person as he does on screen.

Ever since Amityville Horror made him a bonafide big screen hunk and Definitely, Maybe a leading man, Ryan Reynolds has been unstoppable. Next up for the actor – the X-Men spinoff Wolverine, opposite the equally yummy Hugh Jackman.

Here�s some shameless skin from a seriously sexy man.

Here�s something you don�t see everyday.

Some lady bought Lil� Kim flowers for her B-day and wound up dead at her party. Say what? Let me �attempt� to explain, since I�m not 100% sure I get it myself.

Some folks threw Lil� Kim a birthday party at Spotlight Live, a karaoke club in Midtown Manhattan. One of the guests, 24-year-old Ingrid Rivera, showed up with flowers for the rapper, but instead was beaten by a broken champagne bottle and left for dead on the roof of the club.

Kim better hope to God she didn�t see anything and fail to come forward. This would mark the second time she�d been involved in a violent act and not stepped up. A friend of the rapper claims she was at the party only briefly and left before anything went down. But if they didn�t find the body til� morning, how would anyone have known when something went down.

Seriously, this makes me long for those long, dragged out, dramatic tween fights. You know, where Lindsay Lohan would duck into a corner to blow Aaron Carter and Hilary Duff would run out screaming because the red headed slut was loose enough to go to third base when she couldn't. Memories!

Murder ain�t no joke. Our thoughts are with the girl�s family and we sure hope Kim�s got a bomb ass lawyer.

That goes double for Mary Kate Olsen. What the hell is all this about her saying she wanted immunity before talking to the authorities about Heath Ledger�s death. That�s gotta be a rumor, right?

I mean, I know those on set tutors do what they can and hope for the best, but I�d like to think that little pin up troll is smart enough not to incriminate herself by saying she doesn�t want to incriminate herself. What a douche.

I�ll save �em all the trouble. Talk to Ashley. They have that twin ESP thing going on, right? Hey, better yet, maybe all those months, Heath was hanging out with Ashley and just thought it was Mary Kate.

Yeah, Ashley let her roots come in, slipped into a Hefty bag and Culottes and pulled a fast one on him.

Apparently, Heath and Mary Kate weren�t even really dating� they just shared the same masseuse. In the gay community, that�s dating.

Set up a �two for the price of one� after work, you�re even in a three-way relationship.

Apparently, a bunch of people are giving the Golden Girls shit for not popping up at Estelle Getty�s funeral. Some bloggers claim it was a travesty that the legendary actress was buried and none of her former co-stars came to pay tribute.

Here�s what Betty White had to say in her defense. "We were with Estelle when it mattered. I didn't go to her funeral and Paul, her wonderful caretaker, knew I wasn't going to her funeral� Funerals are about [journalism] � who was there and who wasn't? That's not about Estelle. We adored her. To tell you the truth, her passing is tough on us, but it's a blessing for her. She's been so ill for so long, she's in a better place now, wherever she is."

Seriously, how can you stay mad at Betty White? The woman�s 85 years old, and Estelle hasn�t even known who she is for nearly a decade. I have a feeling all three of the Golden Girls had many opportunities to say goodbye and did.

Besides, can you even imagine the number of gay party crashers who would have infiltrated the Hollywood Forever cemetery if Bea, Betty and Rue had all turned up at the same time to pay tribute to Estelle?

They should do a second funeral on Fire Island. Dowse a pride flag in lube and fly it at half mast.

Anderson Cooper may not be out, but he sure is acting like a cunty queen. I LOVE IT!

Coop popped up on Live w/ Regis & Kelly earlier this week to act as Kelly Ripa�s co-host while Reege ran off to do one of those lounge acts, no doubt. When talks turned to reality TV, Kelly admitted she�s a sucker for shows like Project Runway and American Idol, while Cooper lamented getting sucked into Living Lohan.

But he didn�t stop there. He ripped into Dina and Ali (�I cannot believe I�m wasting a minute of my life watching these horrific people,� he says, before saying 14-year-old Ali Lohan �looks about 60�), and when Ripa tried to play peace-keeper and suggest it must be rough having these two really talented kids, Cooper interrupted, saying, �I must have missed that episode.�

Bitch. It was totally must see TV.

I love that he also inadvertently admitted to watching The Soup on E! by referencing Denise Richards Colon It�s Complicated (which is how they reference that title). Silver Fox is one saucy character. If you missed the video, check it out here.

And before signing off, I wanted to share with you a really cool quote – this one from rapper Kanye West at a recent concert stop in NYC. Looks like that whole anti-homophobic blitz wasn�t just a stunt.

Kudos to sticking to your guns, Kanye.

"Open your fucking minds. Open your minds. Be accepting of different people and let people be who they are. You know how many people came to me calling me gay cause I wear my jeans the fresh way? Or because I said hey, dude, how you gonna say 'fag' right in front of a gay dude's face and act like that's ok. That shit is disrespectful. Coming from Chicago, where if you saw somebody that was gay you were supppoed to stay ten feet away. It should be time to break out of the intuitions that I was sayin', the steretypes, or the fear, the backlash that I would get if you don't believe in what I believe in, acceptin' people for who they are�they're very talented and if they do something special in the world and they're discriminated. I've flown across the world y'all, and I've come back here to tell you – open your minds and live a happier life�"

Until next time – take some time to stop and smell the gossip. – Issued by Gay Link Content

  • Ross von Metzke is the Entertainment Editor of Gay Web Monkey and GayWired.com. The former Editor in Chief of Xodus Magazine, his work has appeared in YM, Performing Arts, The San Diego Union Tribune, Entertainment Weekly, Instinct and Link. Ross lives in Los Angeles.

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