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Gossip So Good, It's Got To Be Gay

Ross von Metzke | April 22, 2008

Spinning in his undies

There�s something so hot about a man who can spin.

Music, sickos.

No, seriously – if a guy�s got a hot bod, doesn�t mind taking to the tables with his shirt off and can play a mean set, I�m there.

Guys don�t get much hotter than DJ Scotty Thomson – and look, he takes it one step further. Spinning in his undies.

Scotty�s quick rise from New York club kid to playing for them has taken him from Miami�s White Party to stints in P-town to appearances in Singapore, Paris and Tel Aviv.

All this and he manages to take time to keep that toned, tanned frame.

Now this is a guy I�d stay up past 3am for.


So British Airways bans Naomi Campbell from flying their airline only to have the supermodel turn around and say she�s boycotting the carrier.

No wonder Swan sucked!

I�ll give Naomi beautiful, but man the girl�s dumb as shit. When you spit on airline security and they tell you to get off their plane and never come back, it doesn�t do any good to turn around and pretend like you�re the one issuing a walkout. Naomi actually wants us to believe that British Airways has begged her to fly with them again, but she�s so pissed about the �missing bag� incident she needs to think things over.

Here�s a thought. Maybe Naomi can do her community service at the airport this time around.

Put the bitch in five inch Manolos and make her walk the runway as an air traffic controller. Make her put on a tacky polyester uniform and hand out peanuts and cocktails mid flight. She can beg the fat man in 3-B to put up his seatback before take off. And if a sky shy kid sees fit to toss his cookies in the lavatory, make her squat down with some lemon scented Fantastik and clean that shit up.

Better yet, give that maid she attacked her frequent flier miles and let Naomi play dodge the cell phone for a few.


In slightly brighter news, how about a round of applause for Azariah Southworth, the only Christian television host who�s gayer than Tammy Faye Bakker.

No, in all seriousness, Azariah took a big risk lately when he announced to the Christian world that he is gay – and proud of it. In a statement, this children�s television host says: �This has been a long time coming. I�m in a place where I�m at peace with my faith, friends, family and more importantly myself. I know this will end my career in Christian television, but I must now live my life openly and honestly with everyone. This is my reason for doing this.�

Southworth is the host of The Remix, a show seen in more than 128 million homes worldwide. His statement continues: �I know I will be cut off from many within the Christian community, and if so, then they didn�t get the point of the life of Christ. I believe by me living my life honestly and authentically now, I am able to be a better person and a better Christian��

Maybe now he can take a gig with TMZ and run around the world finding republicans and religious folk tapping their feet in restrooms. Now there�s a show I�d tune into.

Here�s something puzzling. Christians probably wont let this guy anywhere near their kids anymore, but Amy Winehouse gets to pose with a relative�s baby while knocking back shots?

No fair.

As she further slides down the slippery slope of sobriety, Winehouse was faced with news that both her U.S. and U.K. record labels will refuse to issue a new album from the artist until she gets clean and sober.

The good news: That her label is putting Amy�s health before business.

The bad news: She�s probably just find another label to release her shit.

The worse news: If she gets sober, is anyone ready to listen to Amy�s �I�ve found Jesus� comeback album?

Hell has frozen over – someone offered Mariah a part in a new movie, and it�s premiering next week at the Tribeca Film Festival. The flick is called Tennessee, and near as I can tell, Mariah�s playing an aspiring country singer trying to flee her abusive husband. She�s got cornrows and everything.

Best part is – this is the part Janet claims she gained 60 pounds to play. You know Mariah didn�t gain no weight – just the extra fifteen she was struggling with while squeezing herself into her Spanx during the Mimi tour.

Now that�s a slap in the face – if you�re gonna gain 60 pounds for a movie, make sure the ink is dry on the contract, they have bucket loads of cash just waiting for you to say �action� and that the director doesn�t have his eye on some other actress singer.

Not as big a slap in the face as finding out your dad is pimping out baby photos for a child you claim you aren�t even carrying.

That�s the word on the street for Ashlee Simpson. Not three days after she told the press she�s not pregnant, her father is reportedly demanding upwards of $1 million for photos of the baby she�s having with rocker/fianc� Pete Wentz.

Future planning?

Breakdown in communication?

Or if he gets the cash, is he gonna hold Ashlee down and stick her with a baster?

I think that girl seriously needs to think about leaving the country for a few. I mean, the lip-syncing scandal, denying her nose job, rumors she leaked Mariah Carey�s album on the Web so less people would buy it the first week out, now this� she�s lucky half of Hollywood doesn�t march at her condo with torches.

For those of you who actually still give a shit about Ashlee�s music, her new album, Bittersweet World, is soon to be released.

She�s released two singles – neither one of them has charted. Can anyone say VH-1?

And finally, sad, sad news for Gwinney Paltry fans out there.

Did y�all know when she gave birth to her second baby Moses she suffered from Post Partum Depression?

Maybe she finally realized what a fucked up name Apple is for a kid.

Following in Brooke Shields� footsteps, Paltrow says: �I didn�t know I had it until after it was over. I just didn�t know what was wrong with me. I felt really out of my body. I felt really disconnected. I felt really down... I felt pessimistic.�

If she wasn�t such a bad actress, I�d say she was lying.

Girl, that�s when you go get the drugs. Dope up, feel nothing for 72 hours and take a long, meandering drive through your backcountry of choice. It worked for Anne Heche, Marie Osmond, Margot Kidder.

Sure, only three of those ladies had post-partum, but they all landed the cover of people.

Alright folks – I�m off like a prom dress. Til next time, remember – take the time to stop and smell the gossip! – Issued by Gay Link Content

  • Ross von Metzke is the Entertainment Editor of Gay Web Monkey and GayWired.com. The former Editor in Chief of Xodus Magazine, his work has appeared in YM, Performing Arts, The San Diego Union Tribune, Entertainment Weekly, Instinct and Link. Ross lives in Los Angeles.

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