Ross von Metze | March 15, 2006
Our roving gossip columnist brings you ten interesting tidbits live from Las Vegas
Well, I am writing you from the living room of my suite in the east tower of the Luxor in Las Vegas. I�m not trying to drop that I have a suite� or that it�s fabulous. I merely bring this up because, as a 26-year-old guy born and raised in Southern California who has traveled Europe, South America and the Caribbean over, I have never been to Sin City.
This is my first trip, and man is this place one big mess of debauchery.
Some interesting tidbits I thought you might like to know.
First off, I spotted Celine Dion nine, count them nine times between the luggage carousel and arriving at my hotel. Twice in brochures left lying on the airport carpeting, on a gigantic billboard as you exit to the cab pick-up, on an advertisement on top of my cab, on an advertisement on top of the cab next to me, on two billboards leaving the airport, on a billboard above the strip and on the mug the lady sipping coffee in the Luxor lobby had just purchased.
But the city itself has mixed reactions to the Canadian chanteuse. While most will admit her show is pretty damn good (which I will find out for myself on Saturday), they also offer varying stories as to why she took the gig in the first place. There�s the �Rene (Celine�s grandpa of a hubby) Angelil needed to be somewhere warm for his heart condition� theory, and the �Celine needed quick cash to pay off some of Rene�s gambling debts� theory. My personal fav is that Celine and Rene are swingers and needed to be in a place where that lifestyle is not frowned upon, courtesy of one very drunk woman who just moved here from Dallas to dance at Cheetah�s.
And everyone is pretty well in agreement that her copter pad at Ceasar�s Palace that she uses to travel to and from her home, which is 15 minutes away, is pretentious and annoying, not to mention the folks resorting out at Lake Las Vegas hate her when she flies up at 1am after taking in an after work cocktail with Elton, Gloria or one of the other countless celebrities who blow through her theatre.
But enough about my favorite fist thumping Frenchie. Vegas is about entertainment, it�s about nightlife, and on that note, I thought I�d do a
top ten entertainment list� a little Vegas update if you will
10. Sigfried & Roy have left The Mirage, and with them, the white tigers, which I was oh so bummed to find out.
9. In case any of you were wondering what the fuck ever happened to Rita Rudner (or for those of you who forgot she existed) she�s alive and well at New York, New York and as a sometimes shopping commentator for Las Vegas Magazine.
8. The �best singa in zee world� is not Celine Dion but Danny Gans, according to billboards all over town. So who exactly is Danny Gans? Hell if I know, but I can�t help but wonder how anyone actually proves this theory.
7. Tom Jones is coming to town for 13 nights only. Until next month when he�s back for another eight nights only.
6. Has Vegas become a dumping ground for every �80s band I forgot existed? REO Speedwagon, Hall & Oates, Bon Jovi, Nelson, Ratt� now if someone could just dig up Def Leopard, I�d really be happy.
5. Frank & Barbra: The Show That Never Was might have been cute as a drag act, but instead, it just looks kind of sad with Sharon Owens and Sebastian Anzaldo, who I swear did a week on The Bold and the Beautiful, in the leads.
4. And they don�t hold a candle to the red head singing to her slot machine at Luxor last night. �Didn�t We Almost Have It All�, I believe it was. Touche!
3. Donald Trump is in the middle of building a luxury condo high-rise on the strip. Until it�s ready to open, though, he saw fit to build a luxury, two story, 3,800 square foot sales office.
2. Ghostbar, at The Palms (you know: Where all those drunk kids from Real World kicked it for four months), is also where Paris Hilton allegedly tripped and fell flat on her face after a �trip to the powder room� last month.
1. A contest on the strip promises you�ll win an eBay gift certificate, a treasure hunt that could be worth millions, or a tour of Wayne Newton�s Vegas ranch. Man, if I won the latter, there�d be hell to pay.
Ah, but life is not all things Vegas this week. We�ve got a couple other things happening in the world of entertainment this week, and in keeping with the theme of Sin City, these two headline making revelations seemed fitting.
First up, everyone�s favorite stick-thin cokehead, Kate Moss, who allegedly used a Fabrege egg to tote her stash of coke, Ecstacy and the date rape drug Rohyphnol around the world. The story was leaked to the press by a London tabloid, which claims Moss had the $100,000 encrusted artifact crafted for the sole purpose of toting her drugs.
Former model booker Gavin Massale claims her first saw the egg when Moss took a trip to South Africa to meet with then president Nelson Mandela in 1998. He told the British tabloid The Sun she produced drugs out of her egg when a group of models was heading into town to go dancing.
"She took two Rohypnol pills,� he says. �We then lay in her bed chatting, then she passed out. Kate traveled the world with that egg.�
He also claims she would indulge in days long binges with fellow model Naomi Campbell. This is all well and good, but my question for Massale is, what the fuck did Katey do to you for you to rat her out like this? What did she cut you off? Stop giving you the good shit. Stepping in to help a friend who has a problem is one thing, but killing the party with your anger and jealousy is quite another.
And in other drug related news, looks like Boy George is going to escape a jaunt up the river by agreeing to check himself into rehab. After a minor fine ($1,000), all George has to do it sit around with some therapist, chat about his problems and he�s home free.
I guess my question is� what the hell is going on here? I didn�t think it was the drug abuse that was the problem. I was more concerned with the fact that, when George was caught with the 5 grams of coke, it was after he called the cops claiming someone had broken into his apartment. What sort of person leaves their coke lying around when they know the Popo is on the way? That�s called off your rocker, and I�m thinking BG might benefit more from a stint to a psychiatrist than a week at Promises.
So, police dropped the drug charges but sentenced George for wasting police time. Sounds like a pretty nelly ass deal to me, don�t it?
And so we�ve finished folks. We�ll return next week to our regular format with bitches, hot men and women and more torrid tales of lies and deception live from LA. Until then!
Ross von Metzke is the Editor in Chief of Xodus Magazine and a featured columnist for GayWired.com. His work has appeared in YM, Performing Arts, The San Diego Union Tribune, Entertainment Weekly, Instinct and Gay Web Monkey. Ross lives in San Diego.
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