Hollywood Celebrity Buzz
Ross von Metze | May 05, 2005
Paula Abdul plays doctor
Paula Abdul finds herself in kickoff position this week at the center of a scandal that makes even her supposed drug use look like child�s play – no pun intended, of course.
You see, the scandal in question here is an alleged relationship between the 43-year-old Cold Hearted Snake and a former American Idol contestant, 23-year-old Corey Clark.
Clark was given the boot from the top ten in 2003 after producers discovered he�d been charged a few years back with kicking his girlfriend�s ass. Now he�s shopping around a tell-all book which alleges he and Abdul had an affair while he was a contestant. He also claims that Paula dated at least one other Idol contestant – Justin Guarini.
Clark has a record deal with Universal imprint Bungalo Records and is prepping for a summer release for his debut disk – but not before he slings a bit of dirt. Clark claims Abdul promised to produce and bankroll his debut disk and even slipped him an undisclosed amount of cash, so long as he kept their affair on the DL.
As ABC News prepares to air what they claim is a scathing tell all of behind the scenes antics and accusations on American Idol, Abdul is reportedly appalled, issuing this statement:
�Paula Abdul will not dignify the false statements made by Corey Clark with a response. Mr. Clark is an admitted liar and opportunist who engages in unlawful activities. He is communicating lies about Paula Abdul in order to generate interest in a book deal.�
Coming on the heels of her People Magazine interview where Abdul let the world in on her years of painful back surgeries following a 1997 dance injury which nearly paralyzed her, reports of her drug dependence and now this affair have made things over at AI �tense and awkward,� an insider said.
Still, for fans watching this week�s episode, the jury is out. While some people think Abdul might be walking on eggshells and switching to water, several of you are still convinced there�s a problem. Faithful reader Dawn Blain said Abdul �acts like I feel when I�ve had far too many Bacardi Silvers � �Rum does go well with coke, you know.�
So amid Abdul�s plight, while our hearts go out to her, as the cold, unfeeling bitch I am, let the games continue. Watch, attempt to diagnose, and send your theories to email@example.com. What is Paula popping?
Kelly Ripa kicking it with trannys!
It was kind of an awkward interview. On Monday�s Live With Regis and Kelly, Desperate Housewives star Felicity Huffman stopped by to talk about her new film, Transamerica, in which she stars as a man seeking surgery to become a woman. Poor grand pappy Regis looked like he was about to fall off his rocker in confusion – even Felicity looked a bit awkward discussing the subject at 9am, cameras rolling.
So up steps Kelly Ripa, first with a sentimental shout out, then with an instantly comforting crack.
�It�s amazing to think of how difficult it must be living your life in a body you don�t feel like you belong in,� Kelly said, quickly switching gears.
�I live downtown, I know all about these things. The trannys are my peeps.�
Thank God someone�s able to throw PC out the window at the crack of dawn.
Rosie attempts to mend Kirstie rift
First she tried to apologize to Kirstie Alley with beat poetry on her website. Now Rosie O�Donnell is sending Kirstie Alley flowers and making TV apologies.
�I haven�t heard from her,� O�Donnell told Access Hollywood.
The feud began when Rosie told reporters she was convinced Kirstie Alley had lied about her start weight when shooting Fat Actress. Rosie felt Kirstie was far heavier than the 204 lbs she told reporters she�d started at and put a call out to Kirstie to stop lying.
Now, apparently, the newly crowned �queen of mean� has a guilty conscious so she�s trying everything to win her back over. Nothing�s worked yet, but if imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, perhaps Rosie�s new TV movie, Riding the Bus With My Sister, will seal the deal. You see, Rosie plays a developmentally disabled woman in the telepic, almost an exact match to the woman Kirstie played in 2003�s Profoundly Normal.
Who knows what the future holds for these two self-professed fat chicks, but we can tell you one thing. At 30 lbs and counting, the butt of Rosie�s jokes is getting smaller and smaller by the day.
The devil inside Nancy Grace
Pick up a copy of this month�s Details Magazine, because writer Dalton Ross is my new hero. I�ve been saying for months that Nancy Grace, host of her own Headline News show, is a crazy bitch. Ross seems to agree as he titles his look at her TV show, "Is The Woman the Devil?"
As Ross concludes, Nancy gives real journalists a bad name, injecting each show with commentary, opinion and even shouting down her expert guests. It�s like watching political commentators duke it out – only they�re both possessed by her body. If Michael Jackson gets off, it�ll be no thanks to Nancy – if she had her way, she�d pay for him to be sent up the river.
Last week, a call-in viewer called her �trailer-park trash� before being cut off. �Whore� and �cunt� are also words Americans have used to describe her, and Ross quipps, �maybe I watch Nancy Grace because I get the feeling that any moment she�s going to jump through the TV set and choke me for not returning my Blockbuster Videos.�
Love her or hate her, kudos for someone having the guts to go after this Texan teased tart.
Tom Cruise�s latest play toy
I was going to play this one up big, but coming on the heels of his two year romance with that troll doll Penelope Cruz, I�ve learned to expect just about anything from Tom �I�m only gay when I�m out of town� Cruise.
Now, America�s favorite Top Gun is shacking up with an export from Dawson�s Creek, Katie Holmes. Hmmm � Tom�s 42, Katie�s 26. If he keeps working backwards like this, give him a couple years before he starts boinking his War of the Worlds co-star Dakota Fanning.
And that�s all for the buzz this week � fast and loose, just like Nancy Grace. Until we meet again, remember � one person�s trash is another person�s rent check. – Issued by Gay Link Content
Ross von Metzke is the Editor in Chief of Xodus Magazine and a featured columnist for GayWired.com. His work has appeared in YM, Performing Arts, The San Diego Union Tribune, Entertainment Weekly, Instinct and Gay Web Monkey. Ross lives in San Diego.
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