Copyright 2003 | Contact Us

 Ask the doctor @ USN

 Film / TV
 Bodybuilding & training


Getting physical

Workout 101 – Part Two of Six.
Food, Fat and Falling Off the Treadmill � an Update

Ross von Metzke | 27 July 2006

It�s been a month. 30 days. 720 hours. And so far, like clockwork, I have dedicated myself to four days a week, an hour a day, lifting weights, doing squats, crunches, leg lifts, pull ups – and two days of killing myself on the treadmill (I hate the fucking treadmill) – all in the name of a return to San Diego, for San Diego Pride.

So how am I doing?

I gained 3 pounds.

I know, some of you are looking at that and saying, �awww, poor thing.� But mark my words �this is a good thing.

And before you start gushing over the guy in the photo, that's not me, but my trainer, David Rich. K, now you can gush!

You see, part of the problem with being eternally average (not fat, mind you, just not toned) is that, in the past, regardless of what I ate, I never gained weight. Even in my periodic bursts of enthusiastically visiting the gym, no matter how much I worked out, parts of my body just sort of shifted. They never actually got bigger or smaller accordingly.

For a guy who has been the same 158 pounds since I was 17 years old, suddenly topping the 160 mark was truly a revelation. And that�s 161 pounds at 8:30 in the morning, when your body is its lightest. So I�m looking at 162/163 after a good day�s eating. So if I average it at 4 pounds, I am off to a good start in my goal to top the scales at more than 165.

I was thrilled.

Still, Houston, we have a problem.

Upper body is getting some muscle mass. Mid section is slimming out and toning up. I hosted a pool party over the weekend and four people stopped to ask me, �Ross, have you been working out.� A true thrill, let me tell you.

Ass is looking good, chest is toned. But my legs. Oh, my bird legs.

You see, David Rich (pictured again, at right, for more gushing), illustrious trainer than he is, set me up with a total body workout, which I dedicated myself to for the first two weeks.

But my workload increased and I was dealing with moving across town and, on days when I was to work arms and legs but really only had an hour to devote to the gym, I cut a corner. And that corner starts with quadriceps, works its way down through the hamstrings and ends its journey in the calves.

I haven�t touched them for two weeks, and you know what? That�s just the first sign my motivation is waning.

You see, it�s been my experience that when I give up on a body part I don�t see the point in working out, I tend to work my way around the body until suddenly, I�m back on my couch eating Haagen Daas and watching All My Children on Soap Net.

In the past, this would be the point when I�d likely hit the gym tomorrow and skip abs or find a way to not have to do the treadmill. Thankfully, I have the workout Gestapo on my ass, and they must have sensed my interest would be lacking just about now.

Monday morning, check my e-mail. Message from David!

I want you to begin the Accelerated Growth Training Workout on And on one or two of your off days do cardio according to the cardio plan on

When in doubt, change it up! And apparently, I'm going to be doing stuff not unlike the picture at right.

And so, before my bird legs waste away to the size of pegs and snap on me, I�m going to try this wonderful new concept called pyramiding, which as I understand it involves me, beginning with ten reps and ending with two over five sets, attempting to take my body to its absolute limit so I collapse on my couch without enough energy to even open the freezer and see if we have any mint chocolate chip.

Of course, it�s a tad more complicated than that.

I�ll be learning the art of drop sets (where you begin with a heavy weight and as your body maxes out, gradually drop the weight over the course of several sets), continuation sets (In which I take a weight I can do 15-18 reps with and do it 10 times, rest long enough to switch the song on my Nano, then do ten more� all the way up to 50). I�ll be sprinting, maxing, doing muscle rounds. It all sounds very military, but since they�re no way in hell I�m doing a tour of duty in the Middle East, I guess I can handle this.

If you�re interested in taking a peak at the routine I�ll be getting myself wrapped up in, hope on over to and check out the Accelerated Growth Training Workout. And if it all sounds a bit too much, fear not� they have a beginners workout too.

When next we chat, I�ll have worked my way home to San Diego for my big reveal (I�ll think of my self as The Swan who got pretty a decade ago but never really realized my potential). And (bigger gasp) I�ll take pictures so you can see I�m really not full of shit.

Back August 1. Happy sweating until then.

Related stories
Workout 101 – Part One of Six


Search GMax
Search www

Copyright 2006 | Contact Us